Blog Post Header Couple By The Water

By Diekolola Ojoma.

I had a CELL leader in Church who I was very close to and she had an idea of some amorous proposals from known figures I could not even explain how I met them or how it boiled down to those myself.

One day after service on a Saturday, one kept calling, a top Govt. Official. I showed her chats and what the disturbance was about.

She said I needed to take advantage of these men’s attention to settle myself, because elderly men with power, is for financial settlement and social security etc.

She trusted me enough to be vulnerable with me, and confessed her relationship with a married man. She knew it was wrong, but having a man be there for her, was too good to let go.

After that convo, I judged her.

I stopped going to the CELL Meetings and felt she wasn’t good enough to lead me in her office as my CELL leader. I thought that was discretion, but it was pride & self righteousness.

The day I realised what it meant to be saved by Grace & not by our works, God situated that realization in the context of my relationship with her.

I went back to the meetings and was praying for her. One day she called me, she was hurting and distressed. She said, she finally did the right thing and broke it off and she was sorry for everyone she had let down. It is God who changes people and he is still gifting the sudden miracle of salvation to humans; good, bad & the ugly, none is a write off with God.

I learnt my lesson.

I was later appointed to lead a CELL with a surbordinate that was always running away. One day we got to talk and she gave me a thousand reasons why she does not want to be known in Church. She said, ‘if they get to know me better, they will Judge me, I don’t fit in’.

I later convinced her that won’t happen, and became deliberate and intentional in commending her. I started calling her Skimpy for Jesus, because she loves loves skimpy wears.

She also has one of the sweetest, absolutely rancor free spirit and a beautiful heart. After my elder sister, she became my personal reference of Love personified and meekness of Spirit. She grew up on the streets and through her, area boys will show up in Church because she will rally them up and they came.

She possesses virtue and qualities that the Bible recommends for believers. She is the most graceful in words, actions, and full of wisdom, near perfect lady I will say.

Fast forward, she started getting more involved and taking up more responsibilities in Church. One day, she told me she wanted to change her wardrobe.

I told her to be sure she wanted to do that, and not because she is trying to fit in, ‘because I don’t want you looking at yourself one day in the mirror and realizing you have changed into someone you don’t know’. I asked her to pray for a staying conviction about the move. She did and adjusted well.

Each time she sends me a message of gratitude, she will often say, ‘thank you for not judging me and seeing the better of me which I did not even recognize’. I realised how much it meant to her, and that Love is truly the more excellent way.

When it was time for me to leave this year, she was worried and wanted to ask for another leader for the cell. I asked her, what if God has been preparing her for this and also wants to use this avenue to prepare her for more? This is a God chance, so take it, I suggested.

She has increased the CELL’s membership turnout, got a lady who never shows up to become a regular. All these would have been quashed if I sat on a self righteous pedestal.

Love is God’s formula. We can’t bash people, or abrasively talk them into the Kingdom. Even while we were yet Sinners, God loved a sinful world and gave us Jesus! I have tried both ends of being the critique, and would rather choose deliberate and intentional Love response.

There abideth Faith, Hope and Love, and the greatest of them is LOVE… (Love is Patient & Kind). When you call a pauper a King and treats him as one, he will soon start acting the manner with which you address him!

Ps: Thanks for reading and sharing. Shalom!

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